Freedom: A Perspective

I was sitting in a ReelGrrls board meeting this evening and I get so inspired about the work that they do. I wish I could just jump in and help them with all my might. Of course I can do that energetically, but it's just not practical money or timewise for me to be able to give everything I would like. Right now.

So that got me thinking. What would my life have to look like for me to be able to do whatever I wanted in the world? I like working, I like what I do and I love the company I work for now. But how could I get to the point where I could do ANYTHING and what would that be like? I'm usually so absorbed in what's in front of my face that I don't often take the time to dare to dream. It's unfortunate.

Of course, I would need to be funded. I don't have any rich elderly relatives, and I make good money but only enough to support my household. If and when I do retire I'll probably have enough to live modestly. I don't know where this money would come from, but that doesn't mean it won't come, right? It could.

The real element I lack, and this is surprising for me to admit, is the inner freedom to let myself go there. If I truly wanted to, I could arrange my life differently so that the financial burden wouldn't be my number one obstacle. It's not anyway. The obstacle is my mind. It might be shocking to my system, but if I gave myself permission I could do anything. I am surprised by this realization because this inner freedom is how I've gotten to where I am now, but somehow I got complacent and locked into the belief that this is all I am. I have a sneaking suspicion that I am so much more. How can I unwind it?

If I could have anything I wanted, I wouldn't work to make other people rich. I would work only motivated by doing good. I would be able to offer myself up to ReelGrrls as a volunteer or staff member. I would do as much for Dharma as time allowed. I would travel the world and break myself out of my white middle-class capitalist complacency. I would take the time to have a family and then have the luxury of time to raise them. I would smell the roses.

All of this thinking led me to this - right now, I have everything I will ever need and so much more than I ever thought I would. I can't enjoy all the material things life has to offer, and if I do have kids it will be a struggle. But so what.

Just the desire to be a force in improving the lives of others is freedom in itself. That desire says that I am so fortunate in this world, that I am able to rise above my own problems and take a look around. There is nothing wrong with my lot in life. If I have to work until the day I die and I never experience that windfall I think I need, I can spend every one of those days with the intention to benefit those less fortunate. It's not what you do, it's the mind you do it with.